Meowy Kurisumasu!

WaCom Bamboo Pen&Touch

My dad got me a WaCom Bamboo Pen&Touch tablet today. I'm beyond happy~ Downside is i can't install it to my mac because mother dearest forgot the password. Damn.

It's slim and awesome! Mainly because the back part of it is apple green and i love the color green :3

i-City

I went to i-City with the family the other day. :)

I've been away forr a while. I was at DIC (District Interact Conference) for 3 days and 2 nights at Nur Laman Bestari Eco resort at Batu caves. I wrote the whole story in my interact club's blog. Check it out.  :)

I've been away for like a while. I was at camp. Kind of. It;s called DIC. District Interact conference :) Made a lot of new friends. Had an amazing time. I'd talk about it next time, now i'm too tired. and it's been 2 days since the camp. :c

Okay, yesterday i went out with Andy (Ex school senior; was the president of my Art club'10 and was in taekwondo with me, but he never came for practice...well, not that i remember. i skip trainings too. :p) and his friends. We watched a movie; Breaking Dawn and loitered around Pavillion and proceeded loitering at Fahreheit88. I swear, Fahrenheit is so boring. really. Just very boring. It felt empty to me. I just can't wait for their Japanese retail stores to be opened on the top floor. Anyways, i had fun. Met Gwen, and the other guy, who's name i can't remember. But i'm pretty sure it starts with a 'K'. Hmm. Andy was suppose to pay for my movie ticket, because he told me to come with him, but then i pitied him and payed my ticket instead. Man... (￣。￣)

Throughout the whole outing, Andy was being his normal retarded self. We laughed a whole lot. OH! There was a buddy-bear art show outside Pavillion! I got some pictures! There's one for each country!

More on the day, after that, i wen to Ampang point with my dad, we shopped. Well, he shopped. Like a lot. Anyways, in total of the whole day, i walked for 6 hours. Mother burn those calories

Okay, just a short little update. 

Cody Simpson and his 'doll', the 12inch sized replica of him followed me on twitter. on the 9th of december 2011, 1:00am. Being a fan of his voice especially, i am very happy. :)

I'm feeling so down.

genki down.

Went to starbucks, Ampang point with my dad. Had chocolate chip frappacino or something like that. It was really cold. Bought my self an ARASHI 10-11 SCENE Kimi to boku no miteiru fukei stadium DVD concert. Which was really rare. Arashi stuffs are getting common in the malaysian market since their 1oth year. I'm so happy.

Betrayal

I can't help but feel that my own body might betray me one day, my thoughts, my will, my hope and dreams. Just like how every one else or everything else betrayed me along the way.

I like being alone.

I like drinking coffee alone, and reading alone.

I like riding the bus  alone, and walking home alone.

It gives me time to think, and set my mind free.

I like eating alone, and listening to music alone.

But when I see a mother with her child, a girl with her lover, or a friend laughing with their best

friend, I realize that even though I like being alone, I don’t fancy being lonely. 

The sky is beautiful, but the people are sad. I just need someone who won’t run away.

Shaf wrote me another diet tip on her blog . Don't worry, i understand it shaf, Thank you :) Anyways, Shaf has a new obsession for bats . My, my.

I have so much to say but I don’t. I’m afraid of what everyone will think.

It’s a question of attitude. If you really work at something you can do it up to a point. If you really work at being happy you can do it up to a point. But anything more than that you can’t. Anything more than that is luck.

Shaf made me another holiday diet survival tips. Clicky click here. 

It's 3AM. I'm stalking Miranda, the songs are catchy.

Shafieza is such a darling. She's helping me out with my diet :')

 here are her tips! It's humorous i tell you!

 Was at KDE today, had tea at the sports cafe alone, while daddy was at the Sauna and sister was the this Korean MOA concert. I doodled and journaled while i was there.

This cat's eyes are piercing huge. I couldn't have a descent dinner because it was too cute.

I really like the word 'Et Cetera' since forever and i always write the word 'Et Cetera' on all my notebooks. Today, i found a beautiful small hardcover brown linen notebook which had the word 'Et Cetera' already on it. Without actually thinking twice, i bought it. It's now my food/health journal. :)

I tried to draw me. I failed. Sorry for the bad quality photo. It was dark.

This graphic art reminds me of snow and nothing reminds me of snow like December. 

Diet December begins!

Everyone feels lost at one point in their lives. It could be because of a sudden change or impact which leaves them confused and helpless. But whatever the reason may be, everyone should have at least one person who they can turn to, without the feeling of burden or annoyance. Do you know what I mean? No one wants to be labeled as that person who is always depressed and sulking, but somewhere out there, there is at least one person who will be able to accept you regardless of what you think you are. I’m sorry if none of this makes sense

 Saw a Cody Simpson Coast to Coast ep CD at the SPEEDY store today. I really wanted it. Like, really. I'm such a fan of his voice. Unfortunately, i didn't buy it. I got my reasons. Starting to regret not buying it now, but it's okay, i'll just buy his new Album in 2012...or maybe get it as a present? :3

Oh and i bought a new purse today. My old one was torn and i was in need of a new one since April. So i got an adorable 'Rilakuma' bear purse.

For some reason, every now and then, i feel lonely.

I really connected to this piece of artwork.

Good Morning. I'm not much of a daily talker and mostly the type to talk about emotional and disturbing thoughts and whatever not, but i decided to actually talk about my day...so far that is. Well, i'm feeling OK today. Not too happy, not too upset either. I guess the day is progressing to the good today. That's good. 

I'm in love with this video. It's made by Ryan Woodward. Honestly, his works are all amazing in such a simplicity manner. I'm very impressed. I really like how the movements of his character's contemporary dance is so loose and powering. This isn't the original. I just like this version better because it goes well with the song, the original video is here . I highly recommend this being watch!

Shafieza made me listen to the band Scorpions and told me the story of her parents love when they were young. It's funny and sweet really, her father sang a song from the band called 'Can't live without you' to her mom and her respond was something merely like 'What kind of music is this?!' or something similar to that comment. Anyways, i find this song meaningful. The message is portrayed.

This one is by Vayne . This is very captivating!

This illustration by Meg Park is just adorable.

I think the reason why I don’t speak as often is because I have nothing left to say.

Sisters

My sister is adorable.

The pictures are actually from 3-2 months back and i got my hair chopped of after the photo was taken. So i guess it is pretty old? But i like these pictures. It's rare i take photos with her. I have to wait until she is in the mood to take photos.

Honestly, We are all troubled kids.

I don’t know why I hesitate to socialise anymore.

 In the comforts of my mind, I never found it wrong, but my heart would say otherwise. I guess my care for you was too strong that I cannot even let myself begin lavishing words to another. Only put my head down in shame for how I am still committed to old genuineness.

Someone just save me from my own thoughts please.

I gave it a chance. it was never my intention to believe you from the start, but somehow, your words got into me from day one and now i’m torn into pieces. It’s like whatever you said meant nothing. When i expected everything was to go smoothly, it didnt. When i expected you to understand, you didnt. When i expected for some good kind of change, there wasnt.  How dare you make a fool out of me.

Damn. I hate it when I get sad all of a sudden. All these thoughts just run through my mind and these mixed emotions come in. Then I get stuck listening to sad songs and I begin to lose my cognition. It’s just one of those days. 

I’ve been alone for far too long. I’ve grown up to understand so much. But I’m only still such the child at heart that I never got to be. Trying to go backwards but I can’t because I have to be this way. In order to save myself, I have to grow up. But I’m so unhappy.

-keith

I know, constellations away, as far as infinity would go, i know some how, someone out there wishes for my existence, craving for my being, longing for my love and is impatient to hold on to me, but is patient enough to know that i am on my way.

I don’t really like talking. I don’t know what to say/reply when someone tells me something. I don’t know what to say too, somehow, everything that I’m supposed to say feels like it doesn’t have to be said.

There is really nothing for us to talk about anymore. We are complete strangers now, so when we come across each other one day, don’t stop and stare, keep on walking.

It’s like I’m being sad over nothing. When I say nothing, nothing at all. There’s nothing to be sad about. I’m not that attached and I don’t plan on getting attached with anyone.

I just wanted to break out and rebel.

To just release all this emotional tension i’ve kept to myself for a long while. To just loose control and not care about the consequences. I just sat there, waiting for the right time for society to just brake me down and destroy me. I wanted to vent everything out, i wanted to be heard for once, wanted to scream out this pain inside. But instead, i just sat and waited for time to pass by. I decided to kept in all inside me. Worried on how people would judge me afterwards. I was to scared to be heard. I didnt want to be misinterpreted. So i just sat there. Regretting every flying minute of being mother fucking scared.

I’m craving for what i lack and what i can’t have. Ignoring what is in front of me until it’s no longer there.

The best kind of relief has to be sleep.

That is when you are nothing.

You’re not angry,

You’re not sad,

You’re not lonely,

You’re just nothing.

Lately, I’m lost for words. I don’t even know what to say anymore.

I hate this.

How i don’t go along with my family like other happy families. I’m sorry i’m not the dream ace child. I’m not smart, or talented or anything you ever wanted, i’m sorry okay? I try, but i can’t. I think you should know how it hurts me to know how you don’t like who i am as much as you wish i was.

That feeling knowing how your own mother wish you were someone else. How the whole of you is not what she wanted. There is something better, but you can’t offer it because you just lack it from the very beginning.

Cold Weather

Such a cold morning. It's making me feel like writing something poetic. Like, douche-ly poetic.

Second time on wood. I'm quite satisfied. :)

I call this Rae because this coincidentally looks like her. Ink, watercolor on paper.

Fuck you. Go die. I hope i wont see you anymore.

We have developed this insight that nothing could go wrong, but only until reality checks itself, we have only been observing all the wrongs and never committing to doing what’s right.

This Kills Me.

Here i am with a group of people known as friends. I turn to look away for a minute and then i realized, when i looked back. I was never apart of it from the start. I’m in a standstill. They’re laughing. Never have i felt out of placed. Misplaced in my own reality. I’m an outcast. A misfit. I was so scared. They’re so close yet i feel like i’m watching from a distance. So insecure. Society kills me every time.

Society makes me want to run and hide. To be on my own. To shelter alone. To wonder my existence. To disappear forever

First time painting on wood.

sometimes, growing old with only a cat as your companion seems like a heavenly idea

I don't get it

I’m apparently an emotionally needy person, so emotionally conservative people make me feel like crap. But then other emotionally needy people drain me.

So I guess I need to find someone who’s constantly going to tell me I’m important and special to them? That seems a bit ridiculous. I just need to get over myself. 

Or just be alone the rest of my life. I guess that works too

Moe Kare

Just finished reading Moe Kare recently. Damn, it's so cute. I wish my life was a Shoujo manga, shounen would be pretty cool too.

I really don’t like who i am now.

don’t know why i feel a little lonely lately. Could just be me. I wish someone would make the effort to talk to me. I wish. I’m just so tired for making the first move.

Post PMR. Day-1

I’m back from spending a day with the girls~ it was okay i guess By ok, i mean really stupid, i have my reasons, it's polite if i don't tell. Everyone was swimming and i just played basketball with emma’s boyfriend. Jumped on the trampoline, ran away from Enez’s grandpa’s dogs. Iqa purposely hugged me while she was wet, took loads of pictures of with the girls. Secretly took photos of emma and her boyfriend while they were alone. And yeah :D

Now, i shall go read GANTZ!

• SHAM:What do you call someone who mugs people?
• ME:Mugs? You mean like thugs? Who rob people?
• SHAM:Yeah~
• ME:Umm, what?
• SHAM:A MUGGLE.
• ME:Harry Potter has really gotten into your soul man...

My dad called me in the middle of the night telling me that my PMR exam isn’t important.

Terrific Father, i don't have to study now.

I hate it if I get into sibling fights. I’m always the bad, accused one

I wonder, if anyone in my family has ever actually stopped for a moment and actually thought about how I would feel about certain things. I wonder if they have had ever considered my feelings or at least tried to.

constantly feeling like no one likes me and everyone is just pretending

• Nadia:Hey, Pitbull is mexican right?
• Fazlul:McChicken?

I want to secretly move away

i want to secretly move away, far far away and not let any of my ‘friends’ know and keep it a secret, I wont let anyone know where i have left to and when will i be coming back. no, i wont be coming back. i want to start new, and i want to smile everyday and not feel lonely everyday.

Rain

Ahh… it’s raining right now. I like it when it rains at night. It gives me this huge urge to crawl into my bed and sleep. But somehow, the rain gives me this neutral feeling and all i want to do is listen to some good ol’ rock ballads to soothe the mood and just stare out my window.

just merely upset about things.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.

Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed.Depressed

What I’m feeling now, It’s definitely sorrow

You seem to be the only star i can't seem to reach

I find myself to be a bit lost lately. I don’t know what exactly is this that i am feeling. It feels neutral at the same time it feels like i’ve given up on all and decided to actually let things go out of hand and just stand still and watch. Not a slightest feel of anything.

PMR

one month to my major exam that will pretty much decide my future. fuck this. reasons why i hate about being asian. education seems to be everything. Why is it that i have to be a doctor or a lawyer to be happy? I’m not diving for the money. I want to enjoy what i do, even if it means walking around with my guitar and sing on the streets.

Why?

What is happiness like? I can’t remember that feeling and that rush of excitement i used to feel and get from all of this. Now it’s all nothing but sad. I’m so sad. Why?

My thoughts are going to kill me one day

I always feel like people dislike me, like i irritate everyone. I usually think about it over and over and you know what? I shouldn’t. It’s tiring and i’ve already stressed out enough. These people don’t know me and it’s their choice whether to try and know me better or not. I shouldn’t even be trying to change anything, i shouldn’t even be proving anyone anything.

I'm a cat

The other day on tumblr, Hannah posted a post about wanting to find lost kitties for the Cat family and she wanted to adopt them and i signed up . Haha :D I'm one of the cats now : 3

That is all.

My birthday

Well, i had sports day at school during my birthday. I got tanned. Maclay got second and my marching team won first. The sleepless nights was paid for! Especially, last night. Got home and slept through the day. Again, my birthday, nothing special ever happens.

woke up to 71 inbox on tumblr

Most of them were from Candy wishing me Happy Birthday. She's such a doll. Thank you to those who wished me.

Everyone tells you that you deserve better,

But no one is willing to give it to you.

Nights of nights.

It's half past midnight now. We're (Mine, my sister and I) not done with our Maclay accessories for the marching team. Way to spend my first half hour of my birthday. Well, Mine is sleeping over, so i guess i'm having some what of a sleep over birthday thing. But really though, it's just mostly work. As usual, there's never anything special with my birthday. Here's a picture of a messy floor.

Making my junior wear the Avatar Ear prototype i made. Seems legit and cute.

July

I’m going to be very busy for the next whole week.. I got to host a little ceremony for the Japanese student’s arrival to my school = me speaking japanese the whole effin time they’ll be here…

Then, there’s school sports day and i’ll be busy with the events… i have to face paint people’s faces for a marching event. WOW. so busy so busy.

Candy's present

the present i mailed to candy finally arrived! She sent me a picture of it with her via Tumblr. I'm so happy. she loved the gift. Yay me :)

Go away. Come back. Leave. Stay. I hate you. I love you. Why are you here? Why aren’t you here? Never talk to me again. Talk to me please. Forget about me. Remember me, please

Shooting Stars

Have you ever thought maybe it could be the tears from the sky? Could it be a sign that the sky is falling apart? The earth dying? our world ending? And when the last tear drops, we would all disappear? 

if being human means that I need to be loved, fuck that. The road to being loved is rough. I don’t need to be “human”. Most especially to be “loved”.

Urgh. Aref is so unreasonable sometimes.

• ME:I'm sorry, i didn't mean to make it sound the way it did. I didnt meant it that way at all.
• A:What you said was mean and cruel.
• ME:Did i hurt you that bad? I said my sorry so many times.
• A:do you know i can block you?
• ME:D:

Such a fuckin' baby. I said sorry u diq

For heart, or mind?

 Your heart is usually the impulse that does not want to miss that opportunity, the throb of anxiety that usually lead to pain if misinterpreted and when followed. The brain is the calculated motion and the master mind which predicts the cons and pros and usually right. but when followed, leads to pain. Both leads to pain, but both keeps you on track. Which shall it be?

Under all these smiles and kind words lies a great amount of depressed, evil-minded creature. Who would have thought, huh.

Drew a portrait of Candy today. :)

I AM GETTING TO THE POINT TO WHERE I AM SO FRUSTRATED THAT I AM ABOUT TO breakdown

and cry or actually stab someone.

For art class.

art=messy

Making art is a messy hobby.

For art class.

“LOVE IS A TEMPORARY MADNESS; IT ERUPTS LIKE VOLCANOES AND THEN SUBSIDES. AND WHEN IT SUBSIDES YOU HAVE TO MAKE A DECISION. YOU HAVE TO WORK OUT WHETHER YOUR ROOTS HAVE SO ENTWINED TOGETHER THAT IT IS INCONCEIVABLE THAT YOU SHOULD EVER PART. BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT LOVE IS. LOVE IS NOT BREATHLESSNESS, IT IS NOT EXCITEMENT, IT IS NOT THE PROMULGATION OF ETERNAL PASSION. THAT IS JUST BEING IN LOVE, WHICH ANY FOOL CAN DO. LOVE ITSELF IS WHAT IS LEFT OVER WHEN BEING IN LOVE HAS BURNED AWAY, AND THIS IS BOTH AN ART AND A FORTUNATE ACCIDENT. THOSE THAT TRULY LOVE HAVE ROOTS THAT GROW TOWARDS EACH OTHER UNDERGROUND, AND WHEN ALL THE PRETTY BLOSSOMS HAVE FALLEN FROM THEIR BRANCHES, THEY FIND THAT THEY ARE ONE TREE AND NOT TWO.”

-Louis de Beneries

The type of person I want to be

• someone who learns from past experiences, but can forgive and let go of anger.
• someone who is not rude to others regardless of how they themselves act.
• someone who does not play emotional games, who is honest about her emotions.
• someone who is not irrationally angry.
• someone who makes others feel good about themselves.
• someone who can hold interesting conversation with others.
• someone who is open and less judgmental.
• a positive energy

I HAVE THIS STRANGE DESIRE TO NEVER SEE SUNLIGHT AGAIN.

SHIAWASETSUTE, NANDESUKA?

Wakaranai.

I want to be . . .

I want to be someone who inspires.
I want to stir thoughts and emotions.
I want to cause Change.
I want to be someone, who stands out.
Not for wealth, or attention.
But so that my words, my being, may spread, may cause Change, may stir the minds and hearts of others.
Even if they hate me, even if they don’t agree, no matter their thoughts or feelings toward me.
If I can make them feel, make them think, than I am gifted and that is it’s own reward.
I wish to come to the best of my potential.

i’m so glad i have my sister. She loves to cook! I think with her around, i wont be dying of hunger until i move out for college or something. HEE :D

Respect

If you want respect from others, then learn how to respect yourself. That’s what so many people lack. They think that everyone will just immediately bow down and do whatever they say, listen to every little thing; no. Don’t think that because you’re a know-it-all people will respect you from your big title and talents. You’re nothing if you can’t even respect yourself

I miss talking to you

Not because I like you. I just miss those good conversations that kept on going. Those conversations that always made me smile and laugh. I miss our good connection. I just miss our good memories we shared together. I miss everything that happened between us. It sucks to know you don’t even care. But you know what? It’s going to be a new year. I’ll just let the past, be the past.

I hate being so sensitive

I may not show it, but inside, the littlest things kills me. I try hard not to show it, because I hate feeling as I’m weak around people. The littlest things you do to, can hurt me. Not physically but mentally. Imagine when I deal with a heartbreak.

I don't get it

Why am i always feeling lonely? Even with all these people around me? Even if i was cheering in a cheerful and noisy crowd, even if i was sitting with even only one person next to me? Maybe because all my thoughts end the same; no matter what you do, how you’ve lived and what impact and legacy you’ve once left behind, you will always be only one individual. You are only one person. You, yourself will always, in the end, stand alone. 

How can I deal with insanity if the only thing that keeps me sane is far from my reach? The only person that loves me, for me.

sometimes i just can’t make up my mind

sometimes i just can’t make up my mind. Which is it that i really am sure of? . I dont believe in love, long lasting relationships, commitments and try my best to escape; avoid all those kinds of feelings. If i were to choose, i guess fling over commitment. But sometimes, most of the time, i want all those y’know? Maybe i secretly do want all those feelings, maybe i want commitment? Maybe, i do have a little pinch of hope in love.

Good Day is Good.

Today is a good day! No drama, dilemma and no controversy! It’s a smooth and fun day today and i’m very content. No rants today! X) There was a Teachers Day Performance Audition today and my class decided to bail on it. Believe me, we weren't prepared. :S Me and Rishah was planning to do a Freestyle Teachers’ Day rap, but we bailed because we are too cool to perform. LOL

Hmm, and.... today i brought my novel entitled ‘The Trouble  with Valentines’ by Rachel Gibson from The Little Black Dress (and knowing it’s from Little Black Dress, there were a lot of Sexual Scenes in it. hee hee)  and my classmates got really excited bout it (NOOBS, lol) everyone wanted to read it (only the sex scenes) and no one wanted to let it go. It’s such a funny sight. In the end of the day,  Shamir grabbed the book and everyone sat in a big circle and before i knew it, we were having a story telling moment, read by Shamir. For a moment there, we all bonded together, silently like little innocent children listening to a campfire story. WOW. It was fun and so memorable :) What a day~

Late night studying

It’s 11:11 PM! Make a wish! :D

Anyways, it’s late. Definitely past my Bedtime. Funny, I’m not sleepy yet, usually i’d hit the hay before it reaches 10PM. Maybe because i had a ‘nap’ earlier in the afternoon. Hmm, since I’m not sleepy, i might as well study something.. Science or Math.. I’d go for Science! I’m not a huge fan of math, i hate numbers that seems endless... D:

My mom gave me a ‘light’ lecture on how i don’t study enough and that I’m not focused on my studies as much as i am on my activities (Art, school project, etc) She’s right though, i hate studying mainly because I’m more of a physically active person. I’d rather do sports. But i like reading~ :3 Good Books will get my attention, i don’t like studying as much as i like reading. Hmm, does that make any sense?

Well, i’d better go hit the books and study now! 

Have a good night~

Jokes

Friend: ‘Why did the chicken cross the road?’

Me: ‘Why?’
Friend:’Because it wanted to get to the other side’
Me:*LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY*


Why is it that i laugh at the lamest, or unfunny jokes? and i would be all like “You think that’s funny” on really funny brain cracking and stomach aching jokes. I find it weird. WHY DO I LAUGH AT AWKWARD LAME JOKES? Why can’t i or why do i rarely laugh at those really funny stomach bursting jokes like everyone else does?
s
Oh god, i have a weird sense of humor.

On the bright side, for those who has lame, weird awkward puns or jokes up their sleeves, share it with me, i would laugh at it like nobody’s business.


PEACE V

It;s always hard to let go, forget and ignore something that had once been such an impact and influence in your life. But, life goes on, so must we.

Weakness

All the time. All the freaking time. I have so much to say, so much. To rant out, to express to share, i can never put anything to words. Honestly, i’m not good with words. That feeling where you just need to cry out, yell, ask for that little peak of attention, but you can’t, because what or how you feel inside has never actually found a way out through words, explanations. And That, just clashes my pride, that, is what i call my weakness.

Control Freak

Yes, when things dont go the way i want it to, or it goes our of control, i’ll freak. I’ll break down, or freak. I’ll get pissed and just bark. I hate it so much, when something dont go as i planned. It makes me feel like i failed something, like to the max. But, then i’ll get over it and fix it right away. I guess im that kind of person, it’s a bad quality of mine, but also good. Bad in a sense, i freak out, break down, and start scolding people for not valid reason, but i apologize after of course, i feel bad for barking at them (Yes, my bark is worst than my bite.)

Drew this for my school IU DAY exhibition. Meet Fransisco De cuellar

No matter how hard you tried, it’s just never good enough. Even when you gave it all your heart. It feels like you failed everything in your life and nothing matters anymore. It’s a terrible thing to feel. But you feel it every time.